Small Shifts in Thinking Will Have the Greatest Butterfly Effect

The best cartoon I have ever seen was of people in a boat, just a silhouette and someone yelling down from a boat above, ‘Where are you from?’ the voice from the boat below ‘Earth!’

That is it. Full stop. The rest of the judgements and segregation that follows in todays society is appalling.

When you are in the hospital and you walk past the nursery and there are rows of babies

Is there a section for religious beliefs, how about income, sexual orientation, criminal background? A baby is a baby.

Then that baby comes home and everything else that follows, then directly and indirectly impacts on that person and they start to be separated out and classified down further and further until they are completely disconnected from everyone including themselves.


It is NOT working.

People need to have personal beliefs that make sense completely to them. What those beliefs are is NOT for me to judge, or have an opinion on, unless invited.

People are so scared to own their beliefs or engage with them because of judgement and persecution that shouldn’t exist. NO one has the right to judge another human. We have got to stop coming at this from a im right your wrong attitude and celebrate our diversity and care for one another.

We live in a culture that has people believing and thinking, that they are better than other human beings and then list the ways, money, status, religious background – It is all complete Bull Shit!


Oh yes but im better than a murderer – NO

But im better than an addict – NO

But im better than a homeless guy – NO

But im better than… NO, NO, NO!

The greatest leveller of all time is our humanity! Yet a large percentage off us fail to understand our own, or have the compassion to recognise it in others without first forming a judgement.

As far as im aware there is no divine being among us, so im afraid all the money and status, fame and celebrity, is therefore, irrelevant – sorry Kanye you will never be God.

People in todays society, don’t get to that place of being so disenfranchised from everyone and everything, that they break the law, without first experiencing, serious impacts on that person’s ability to feel connected.

A man interviewed me the other day and as I talked to him about my pain and the total circumstances surrounding my struggle at the time, he was moved to tears. Then he apologised and said ‘Im sorry I am getting upset, but you have just made me rethink my divorce. I feel like I have just seen my ex-wife’s pain for the first time.”

That is it, and that is all, when we can set aside everything else and see each others humanness and help them through pain and not judge them for having it, or for making  even worse choices to try and conceal it. It is then that we will see an enormous shift in society.

This truth comes out of me, not from a place of arrogance, but of a place, of humbled experience, through a journey that I would have never chosen, but I’m now grateful for. Im grateful for the compassion or others I now have and im grateful for the opportunity it gave me to finally know myself.

I recently came across an article about a horrific rape/murder over 30 years ago and whilst I automatically felt sadness for the family of the victim, by the end of the article I felt an even greater sense of sadness for the 14year old boy who took part in commiting it.

Reading about his rejection from his parents and abuse he suffered at the hands of others, im not for one second condoning or excusing the behaviour of what came next, but if a child has never been modelled respect, love, security, acceptance, compassion or kindness, I found it extraordinary that he could then be made accountable for his horrific choices and given a life sentence, never to be released at 14!

I thought of myself at that age and the mistakes I had made, I thought about my son, who is older than that boy was. That he could be judged, now, for an incredibly  bad choice he might make for the rest of his life was devastating to me.

That 14year old boy, didn’t wake up that fateful day with that horrific outcome in mind and then many things contributed to what came next. This was a long time ago and the man that he is now has come to terms with the gravity of the situation and accepted his fate and he holds incredible sadness for his crime.

The significance of this point, is that there are people all over the world being bred into despair. Pain that has been inherited and HOPE has been extinguished in some communities altogether. Then we wonder in judgement about what is wrong with a person that they could do such horrific things.

HOPE – Help Other People Everyday. This is the only way forward, if we don’t want so see further decay.

It starts with self care and self awareness, then vulnerability and authenticity then forgiveness and new understanding of what has been, and that it doesn’t mean, its an indicator of what’s to come. The end result of reconnecting a human back to themselves and to society, is engaging their own unique passion and having an outward focus.

If we as a society re commit to this vital learning that needs addressing we will see definite ripples of positive change.

We must build on this truth as a matter of top priority, otherwise show me where the rapist/murdering section of the nursery is, because I must have missed the signs.